Internal Worlds Reeling: Transference and Counter-transference in Action

Sooooo,
What do you see!?

---

This is what my friend and I asked our Group Psych course the other day when we were co-leading group.

 
          What sticks out to you?                        
                                                                          What feelings arise?  
  
                                       What feelings do not?

It was an extremely fascinating class, to say the least.

Some of what we heard:



Boobs,
Hope,
Chaos,
Soap/Cleansing,
Muck,
Instability,
Spines,
Engines,
Stomach issues,
Peace,
Anxiety,
Scarcity,
Frustration,
Rising from the messes,
Just a plain mess,
Feeling bare,
Feeling naked,
and why even try to by pass the Phallic reference?      
                                                                                                        ;} 

---

      Oh the projections we cast...

I've been thinking about this a lot lately.      A LOT!
How much of what I see is actually reality, and how much of the person,
the situation,
the object,
the sculpture in front of me
is really acting as my movie screen for the intrapsychic film  that is playing from my inside.

When am I being a walking projector of my past harms,
and fears,
and victories?--
and present tense should be added too.

We make microcosmic of our internal worlds,  transferring unconscious feelings, thoughts, hopes, motives to what is presented externally in front of us.
At least this is the case for me.
And this last week has been far more than generous with its proportions of  those moments.

I picture myself facing a engaging with a loved one, or stranger, or acquaintance, and imagine, just as though they were standing in front of the lens of a reeling movie --I can still see them, but there is a thin layer of an active, relatable, but not-entirely-relative story playing over top-- and my eyes are that lens from which that story comes.

While I do believe in the vastness of human capacity, and that it is possible to be completely void of any subjective opinions--though that's probably more likely for an actively practicing Buddha, lets be real ---
due to the thick thick layers of our defense mechanisms which have buildt up and there ever  continuation of them  doing so,
I believe its quite enough to start where I am.

By knowing the film is rolling,
watching it,
and reminding myself that this person,
situation,
object,
sculpture,
is not the stomach ache I had at lunch,
or mess that I am rising from,
or the emotionally naked I feel,
or what hope I have.

Yet, how can I still honor that real life stuff that is living inside me which is coming out?
How can I detach from my story, to honor the objective?
                                                       
                                         Oh, attachment and detachment is a whole different post.

In the loveliness of the Nirvana Shatkam:
"Neither am I mind, nor intelligence, Nor ego, nor thought, Nor am I ears or the tongue or the nose or the eyes,   Nor am I earth or sky or air or the light...Neither am I the movement due to life, Nor am I the five airs, nor am I the seven elements, Nor am I the five internal organs, Nor am I voice or hands or feet or other organs...
I am one without doubts, I am without form...I am always redeemed,
I am Shiva, I am Shiva, of the nature of knowledge and bliss. 

Love you guys!
Be real, but not too reel ;D :::wahhwahhhhh:::