Reading Leaves & Getting to the Next Moment: Appreciation and Preservation in 2020

If you would like to listen along:

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My tea leaves are telling me:

"Being present with what I have
may conjure just enough gratitude
to get me to the next moment". 

No, regrettably,
I have not mastered the art of reading tea leaves,
but I have lived through this lesson with them,
in particular.

For longer than I would actually like to say, I’ve had my loose leaf teas
wrapped up, tucked away, and remorsefully, out of reach. 
I would bring them out for the occasional steep--usually on one of my drink-more-tea-kicks--
​or to have a teapot ​or two with company.
​

Part of me had a sense of obligation
​not to “waste” my tea for the
​“ordinary-everyday-use” but to save
​these "precious" leaves to consume on those
​“special occasions”. 

​I find it perplexing how “significance” and “insignificance” have strong proclivities
​to precipitate similar behaviors in us humans.

Reverence, quite like irreverence, can to create    

​d  i  s  t  a  n  c  e  ,

and    d  i  s  t  a  n  c  e    can sometimes lead to   

neglect   

;forgetting   .

My attempts to be reverential and prudent with the nouns of my life--beyond just my tea--has actually lead to dismission,
and lack of appreciation,
for not only these,
but also parts of myself. 


​And yet, 2020 has shed a new spectrum of light on these very internal & external dynamics of
​appreciation and importance. 

During this formidable year,

where most of us are just doing our best to survive
and to cope in whatever procurable way possible,

where being appreciative and present
​can feel ambitious; 

where we are more aware of 
 d  i  s  t  a  n  c  e 
than any one of us could have ever forseen.

where prudence seems more like a requirement 
and reverence, more than not, mirrors neglect;

where the lines between significance & insignificance
are both blurred and distinct;

where one's sense of self is at risk of
being crushed under the weight of
​honest existential dread;

and "special occasions" hard to find;

getting close to what is close
​& taking life one moment at a time
has been imperative for the majority of us.

​As I unwrapped my tucked-away teas,
placed them into their own jars
carefully labeled,
organized,
and steeped a cup or two;
being present with one of those
​​precious-and yet-forgotten items of my life
reiterated how this year has--quite understandably--
made it far to easy for many of us
​ to wrap ourselves up,
tuck ourselves away,
and put ourselves out of reach
in the name of reverence
--and  neglect
--in this seemingly unraveling world.

​This practice of reacquainting myself with the once revered and  neglected  leaves carves out a moment in my day where I'm reminded to get back 
​in arms-length of who I am;
intentionally unwrap myself and reflect on the precious-forgotten aspects of my life.
It is a time where I can practice re-incorporating that tucked-away appreciation, even on the days when it feels hard;
an opportunity to ponder how my behaviors reflect the reverence I have for the close & distant nouns of my life
​--beyond just my tea--
and make a micro-"special occasion" within the not-so-ordinary-everydays 
we've all been experiencing. ​​

These mindful attempts have helped me to get to the next moment with gratitude
​--as uncertain as that next moment may be.​

I truly hope you are thriving, friends.
But if you are one of the many to just be surviving this year,
I hope you have found, or will find, whatever it is that helps to get to the next moment, with whatever amount of gratitude that can be mustered; whatever it is that might assist you in getting closer to the precious-and-yet-circumstantially-distant parts of yourself​ and your life
​that this year may have created.

​May your literal or figurative tea leaves voice  
"Peace and Presence"
​to you & yours
in this moment & the uncertain moments to come.
​